September 6, 2017

Wednesday lunch with Jane

Today was a rough day – the disease was winning the battle. Jane seemed to go in & out on knowing who I was. However, even when she didn’t seem to know who I was, she always appeared to feel safe with me & want me close by.

It was a very busy day today in Jane’s house – lots of movement & it appeared to take its toll on the residents. The majority were sitting quietly on the couch when I walked in. Jane was sitting in a recliner chair & didn’t seem to recognize me when I came in. No smile, no glimmer in her eye, just blank stares. I sat on the arm of her chair & set my hand on her knee. I was patting her knee & when I stopped she grabbed my hand as if to tell me not to stop. She leaned in to me & I put my arm around her. She leaned in more & grabbed my hand. It was almost like I was a blanket wrapped around her & that is what she wanted. We sat like that, quietly, until lunch was ready.

Jane ate fairly well for me & did seem to recognize her cupcake. Today was a new flavor – it’s called Wedding Cake. Jane didn’t seem to be in a rush & happily allowed me to take a picture. She ate all of her cupcake & then was content to sit at the table. I asked her a few times to go for a walk before she said yes. But once she realized we were going on a walk, she perked up & was happy.

Luckily it wasn’t too hot today – especially when we stayed in the shade. We made a lap & then sat under the tree to talk. I told Jane all about my trip to Key West & most of it she didn’t seem interested in. Even the roosters – which surprised me. However, when I got to the Hemingway cats, she slowed me down. She grinned from ear to ear & loved the story of their 6 toes. This girl with 6 toes on all 4 paws was her favorite. Jane’s eyes got big & she smiled – like a child with a brand new toy. As I flipped through the pictures, we got to the picture of Denali (my foster dog). I told her how Gary had babysat him while I was gone & Jane loved that. Again – big huge smile.

Jane & I made a few laps today, each time sitting under the tree for a break between laps. We would talk a little bit, but mostly just sat quietly. One of the residents in Jane’s house was absent from lunch today so I asked Emely (one of the caregivers) where he was. She told me they took him to the hospital this morning – he wasn’t doing well. This made me sad – he is one of my favorites. I hope he is ok & does not suffer.

I left Jane sitting on the couch when it was time for me to leave. She told me bye but just stayed sitting, calmly. I don’t know if it was all the activity in the house today or just the disease taking over Jane’s mind. All I know is Jane was calm & even though there were moments of her not recognizing me, she always seemed to know on some level she loves me – that I am safe. So I take that as today’s win. And I will hope for a better day tomorrow.